2. CHAPTER II. PAULINA.

Villette / 维莱特

1Some days elapsed, and it appeared she was not likely to take much of a fancy to anybody in the house. She was not exactly naughty or wilful: she was far from disobedient; but an object less conducive to comfortto tranquillity eventhan she presented, it was scarcely possible to have before ones eyes. She moped: no grown person could have performed that uncheering business better; no furrowed face of adult exile, longing for Europe at Europes antipodes, ever bore more legibly the signs of home sickness than did her infant visage. She seemed growing old and unearthly. I, Lucy Snowe, plead guiltless of that curse, an overheated and discursive imagination; but whenever, opening a room-door, I found her seated in a corner alone, her head in her pigmy hand, that room seemed to me not inhabited, but haunted.

2And again, when of moonlight nights, on waking, I beheld her figure, white and conspicuous in its night-dress, kneeling upright in bed, and praying like some Catholic or Methodist enthusiastsome precocious fanatic or untimely saintI scarcely know what thoughts I had; but they ran risk of being hardly more rational and healthy than that childs mind must have been.

3I seldom caught a word of her prayers, for they were whispered low: sometimes, indeed, they were not whispered at all, but put up unuttered; such rare sentences as reached my ear still bore the burden, “Papa; my dear papa!” This, I perceived, was a one-idead nature; betraying that monomaniac tendency I have ever thought the most unfortunate with which man or woman can be cursed.

4What might have been the end of this fretting, had it continued unchecked, can only be conjectured: it received, however, a sudden turn.

5One afternoon, Mrs. Bretton, coaxing her from her usual station in a corner, had lifted her into the window-seat, and, by way of occupying her attention, told her to watch the passengers and count how many ladies should go down the street in a given time. She had sat listlessly, hardly looking, and not counting, whenmy eye being fixed on hersI witnessed in its iris and pupil a startling transfiguration. These sudden, dangerous naturessensitive as they are calledoffer many a curious spectacle to those whom a cooler temperament has secured from participation in their angular vagaries. The fixed and heavy gaze swum, trembled, then glittered in fire; the small, overcast brow cleared; the trivial and dejected features lit up; the sad countenance vanished, and in its place appeared a sudden eagerness, an intense expectancy. It is!” were her words.

6Like a bird or a shaft, or any other swift thing, she was gone from the room. How she got the house-door open I cannot tell; probably it might be ajar; perhaps Warren was in the way and obeyed her behest, which would be impetuous enough. Iwatching calmly from the windowsaw her, in her black frock and tiny braided apron (to pinafores she had an antipathy), dart half the length of the street; and, as I was on the point of turning, and quietly announcing to Mrs. Bretton that the child was run out mad, and ought instantly to be pursued, I saw her caught up, and rapt at once from my cool observation, and from the wondering stare of the passengers. A gentleman had done this good turn, and now, covering her with his cloak, advanced to restore her to the house whence he had seen her issue.

7I concluded he would leave her in a servants charge and withdraw; but he entered: having tarried a little while below, he came up-stairs.

8His reception immediately explained that he was known to Mrs. Bretton. She recognised him; she greeted him, and yet she was fluttered, surprised, taken unawares. Her look and manner were even expostulatory; and in reply to these, rather than her words, he said,—“I could not help it, madam: I found it impossible to leave the country without seeing with my own eyes how she settled.”

9But you will unsettle her.”

10I hope not. And how is papas little Polly?”

11This question he addressed to Paulina, as he sat down and placed her gently on the ground before him.

12How is Pollys papa?” was the reply, as she leaned on his knee, and gazed up into his face.

13It was not a noisy, not a wordy scene: for that I was thankful; but it was a scene of feeling too brimful, and which, because the cup did not foam up high or furiously overflow, only oppressed one the more. On all occasions of vehement, unrestrained expansion, a sense of disdain or ridicule comes to the weary spectators relief; whereas I have ever felt most burdensome that sort of sensibility which bends of its own will, a giant slave under the sway of good sense.

14Mr. Home was a stern-featuredperhaps I should rather say, a hard-featured man: his forehead was knotty, and his cheekbones were marked and prominent. The character of his face was quite Scotch; but there was feeling in his eye, and emotion in his now agitated countenance. His northern accent in speaking harmonised with his physiognomy. He was at once proud-looking and homely-looking. He laid his hand on the childs uplifted head. She said—“Kiss Polly.”

15He kissed her. I wished she would utter some hysterical cry, so that I might get relief and be at ease. She made wonderfully little noise: she seemed to have got what she wantedall she wanted, and to be in a trance of content. Neither in mien nor in features was this creature like her sire, and yet she was of his strain: her mind had been filled from his, as the cup from the flagon.

16Indisputably, Mr. Home owned manly self-control, however he might secretly feel on some matters. Polly,” he said, looking down on his little girl, “go into the hall; you will see papas great-coat lying on a chair; put your hand into the pockets, you will find a pocket-handkerchief there; bring it to me.”

17She obeyed; went and returned deftly and nimbly. He was talking to Mrs. Bretton when she came back, and she waited with the handkerchief in her hand. It was a picture, in its way, to see her, with her tiny stature, and trim, neat shape, standing at his knee. Seeing that he continued to talk, apparently unconscious of her return, she took his hand, opened the unresisting fingers, insinuated into them the handkerchief, and closed them upon it one by one. He still seemed not to see or to feel her; but by-and-by, he lifted her to his knee; she nestled against him, and though neither looked at nor spoke to the other for an hour following, I suppose both were satisfied.

18During tea, the minute things movements and behaviour gave, as usual, full occupation to the eye. First she directed Warren, as he placed the chairs.

19Put papas chair here, and mine near it, between papa and Mrs. Bretton: I must hand his tea.”

20She took her own seat, and beckoned with her hand to her father.

21Be near me, as if we were at home, papa.”

22And again, as she intercepted his cup in passing, and would stir the sugar, and put in the cream herself, “I always did it for you at home; papa: nobody could do it as well, not even your own self.”

23Throughout the meal she continued her attentions: rather absurd they were. The sugar-tongs were too wide for one of her hands, and she had to use both in wielding them; the weight of the silver cream-ewer, the bread-and-butter plates, the very cup and saucer, tasked her insufficient strength and dexterity; but she would lift this, hand that, and luckily contrived through it all to break nothing. Candidly speaking, I thought her a little busy-body; but her father, blind like other parents, seemed perfectly content to let her wait on him, and even wonderfully soothed by her offices.

24She is my comfort!” he could not help saying to Mrs. Bretton. That lady had her owncomfortand nonpareil on a much larger scale, and, for the moment, absent; so she sympathised with his foible.

25This secondcomfortcame on the stage in the course of the evening. I knew this day had been fixed for his return, and was aware that Mrs. Bretton had been expecting him through all its hours. We were seated round the fire, after tea, when Graham joined our circle: I should rather say, broke it upfor, of course, his arrival made a bustle; and then, as Mr. Graham was fasting, there was refreshment to be provided. He and Mr. Home met as old acquaintance; of the little girl he took no notice for a time.

26His meal over, and numerous questions from his mother answered, he turned from the table to the hearth. Opposite where he had placed himself was seated Mr. Home, and at his elbow, the child. When I say child I use an inappropriate and undescriptive terma term suggesting any picture rather than that of the demure little person in a mourning frock and white chemisette, that might just have fitted a good-sized dollperched now on a high chair beside a stand, whereon was her toy work-box of white varnished wood, and holding in her hands a shred of a handkerchief, which she was professing to hem, and at which she bored perseveringly with a needle, that in her fingers seemed almost a skewer, pricking herself ever and anon, marking the cambric with a track of minute red dots; occasionally starting when the perverse weaponswerving from her controlinflicted a deeper stab than usual; but still silent, diligent, absorbed, womanly.

27Graham was at that time a handsome, faithless-looking youth of sixteen. I say faithless-looking, not because he was really of a very perfidious disposition, but because the epithet strikes me as proper to describe the fair, Celtic (not Saxon) character of his good looks; his waved light auburn hair, his supple symmetry, his smile frequent, and destitute neither of fascination nor of subtlety (in no bad sense). A spoiled, whimsical boy he was in those days.

28Mother,” he said, after eyeing the little figure before him in silence for some time, and when the temporary absence of Mr. Home from the room relieved him from the half-laughing bashfulness, which was all he knew of timidity—-“Mother, I see a young lady in the present society to whom I have not been introduced.”

29Mr. Homes little girl, I suppose you mean,” said his mother.

30Indeed, maam,” replied her son, “I consider your expression of the least ceremonious: Miss Home I should certainly have said, in venturing to speak of the gentlewoman to whom I allude.”

31Now, Graham, I will not have that child teased. Dont flatter yourself that I shall suffer you to make her your butt.”

32Miss Home,” pursued Graham, undeterred by his mothers remonstrance, “might I have the honour to introduce myself, since no one else seems willing to render you and me that service? Your slave, John Graham Bretton.”

33She looked at him; he rose and bowed quite gravely. She deliberately put down thimble, scissors, work; descended with precaution from her perch, and curtsying with unspeakable seriousness, said, “How do you do?”

34I have the honour to be in fair health, only in some measure fatigued with a hurried journey. I hope, maam, I see you well?”

35Tor-rer-ably well,” was the ambitious reply of the little woman and she now essayed to regain her former elevation, but finding this could not be done without some climbing and straininga sacrifice of decorum not to be thought ofand being utterly disdainful of aid in the presence of a strange young gentleman, she relinquished the high chair for a low stool: towards that low stool Graham drew in his chair.

36I hope, maam, the present residence, my mothers house, appears to you a convenient place of abode?”

37Not par-tic-er-er-ly; I want to go home.”

38A natural and laudable desire, maam; but one which, notwithstanding, I shall do my best to oppose. I reckon on being able to get out of you a little of that precious commodity called amusement, which mamma and Mistress Snowe there fail to yield me.”

39I shall have to go with papa soon: I shall not stay long at your mothers.”

40Yes, yes; you will stay with me, I am sure. I have a pony on which you shall ride, and no end of books with pictures to show you.”

41Are you going to live here now?”

42I am. Does that please you? Do you like me?”

43No.”

44Why?”

45I think you queer.”

46My face, maam?”

47Your face and all about you: You have long red hair.”

48Auburn hair, if you please: mamma calls it auburn, or golden, and so do all her friends. But even with mylong red hair’” (and he waved his mane with a sort of triumphtawny he himself well knew that it was, and he was proud of the leonine hue), “I cannot possibly be queerer than is your ladyship.”

49You call me queer?”

50Certainly.”

51(After a pause) “I think I shall go to bed.”

52A little thing like you ought to have been in bed many hours since; but you probably sat up in the expectation of seeing me?”

53No, indeed.”

54You certainly wished to enjoy the pleasure of my society. You knew I was coming home, and would wait to have a look at me.”

55I sat up for papa, and not for you.”

56Very good, Miss Home. I am going to be a favourite: preferred before papa soon, I daresay.”

57She wished Mrs. Bretton and myself good-night; she seemed hesitating whether Grahams deserts entitled him to the same attention, when he caught her up with one hand, and with that one hand held her poised aloft above his head. She saw herself thus lifted up on high, in the glass over the fireplace. The suddenness, the freedom, the disrespect of the action were too much.

58For shame, Mr. Graham!” was her indignant cry, “put me down!”—and when again on her feet, “I wonder what you would think of me if I were to treat you in that way, lifting you with my hand“ (raising that mighty member) “as Warren lifts the little cat.”

59So saying, she departed.