7. Chapter V: Manicamp and Malicorne.

Ten Years Later / 十年后

1Malicorne, then, left Blois, as we have said, and went to find his friend, Manicamp, then in temporary retreat in the city of Orleans. It was just at the moment when that young nobleman was employed in selling the last decent clothing he had left. He had, a fortnight before, extorted from the Comte de Guiche a hundred pistoles, all he had, to assist in equipping him properly to go and meet Madame, on her arrival at Le Havre. He had drawn from Malicorne, three days before, fifty pistoles, the price of the brevet obtained for Montalais. He had then no expectation of anything else, having exhausted all his resources, with the exception of selling a handsome suit of cloth and satin, embroidered and laced with gold, which had been the admiration of the court. But to be able to sell this suit, the last he had left,—as we have been forced to confess to the reader—Manicamp had been obliged to take to his bed. No more fire, no more pocket-money, no more walking-money, nothing but sleep to take the place of repasts, companies and balls. It has been said—“He who sleeps, dines;” but it has never been affirmedHe who sleeps, playsor, He who sleeps, dances. Manicamp, reduced to this extremity of neither playing nor dancing, for a week at least, was, consequently, very sad; he was expecting a usurer, and saw Malicorne enter. A cry of distress escaped him.

2Eh! what!” said he, in a tone which nothing can describe, “is that you again, dear friend?”

3Humph! you are very polite!” said Malicorne.

4Ay, but look you, I was expecting money, and, instead of money, I see you.”

5And suppose I brought you some money?”

6Oh! that would be quite another thing. You are very welcome, my dear friend!”

7And he held out his hand, not for the hand of Malicorne, but for the purse. Malicorne pretended to be mistaken, and gave him his hand.

8And the money?” said Manicamp.

9My dear friend, if you wish to have it, earn it.”

10What must be done for it?”

11Earn it, parbleu!”

12And after what fashion?”

13Oh! that is rather trying, I warn you.”

14The devil!”

15You must get out of bed, and go immediately to M. le Comte de Guiche.”

16I get up!” said Manicamp, stretching himself in his bed, complacently, “oh, no, thank you!”

17You have sold all your clothes?”

18No, I have one suit left, the handsomest even, but I expect a purchaser.”

19And the chausses?”

20Well, if you look, you will see them on that chair.”

21Very well! since you have some chausses and a pourpoint left, put your legs into the first and your back into the other; have a horse saddled, and set off.”

22Not I.”

23And why not?”

24“Morbleu! dont you know, then, that M. de Guiche is at Etampes?”

25No, I thought he was at Paris. You will then only have fifteen leagues to go, instead of thirty.”

26You are a wonderfully clever fellow! If I were to ride fifteen leagues in these clothes, they would never be fit to put on again; and, instead of selling them for thirty pistoles, I should be obliged to take fifteen.”

27Sell them for whatever you like, but I must have a second commission of maid of honor.”

28Good! for whom? Is Montalais doubled, then?”

29Vile fellow!—It is you who are doubled. You swallow up two fortunesmine, and that of M. le Comte de Guiche.”

30You should say, that of M. le Comte de Guiche and yours.”

31That is true; honor where it is due; but I return to my brevet.”

32And you are wrong.”

33Prove me that.”

34My friend, there will only be twelve maids of honor for madame; I have already obtained for you what twelve hundred women are trying for, and for that I was forced to employ all my diplomacy.”

35Oh! yes, I know you have been quite heroic, my dear friend.”

36We know what we are about,” said Manicamp.

37To whom do you tell that? When I am king, I promise you one thing.”

38What? To call yourself Malicorne the First?”

39No; to make you superintendent of my finances; but that is not the question now.”

40Unfortunately.”

41The present affair is to procure for me a second place of maid of honor.”

42My friend, if you were to promise me the price of heaven, I would decline to disturb myself at this moment.”

43Malicorne chinked the money in his pocket.

44There are twenty pistoles here,” said Malicorne.

45And what would you do with twenty pistoles, mon Dieu!”

46Well!” said Malicorne, a little angry, “suppose I were to add them to the five hundred you already owe me?”

47You are right,” replied Manicamp, stretching out his hand again, “and from that point of view I can accept them. Give them to me.”

48An instant, what the devil! it is not only holding out your hand that will do; if I give you the twenty pistoles, shall I have my brevet?”

49To be sure you shall.”

50Soon?”

51To-day.”

52Oh! take care! Monsieur de Manicamp; you undertake much, and I do not ask that. Thirty leagues in a day is too much, you would kill yourself.”

53I think nothing impossible when obliging a friend.”

54You are quite heroic.”

55Where are the twenty pistoles?”

56Here they are,” said Malicorne, showing them.

57Thats well.”

58Yes, but my dear M. Manicamp, you would consume them in post-horses alone!”

59No, no, make yourself easy on that score.”

60Pardon me. Why, it is fifteen leagues from this place to Etampes?”

61Fourteen.”

62Well! fourteen be it; fourteen leagues makes seven posts; at twenty sous the post, seven livres; seven livres the courier, fourteen; as many for coming back, twenty-eight! as much for bed and supper, that makes sixty livres this complaisance would cost.”

63Manicamp stretched himself like a serpent in his bed, and fixing his two great eyes upon Malicorne, “You are right,” said he; “I could not return before to-morrow;” and he took the twenty pistoles.

64Now, then, be off!”

65Well, as I cannot be back before to-morrow, we have time.”

66Time for what?”

67Time to play.”

68What do you wish to play with?”

69Your twenty pistoles, pardieu!”

70No; you always win.”

71I will wager them, then.”

72Against what?”

73Against twenty others.”

74And what shall be the object of the wager?”

75This. We have said it was fourteen leagues to Etampes.”

76Yes.”

77And fourteen leagues back?”

78Doubtless.”

79Well; for these twenty-eight leagues you cannot allow less than fourteen hours?”

80That is agreed.”

81One hour to find the Comte de Guiche.”

82Go on.”

83And an hour to persuade him to write a letter to Monsieur.”

84Just so.”

85Sixteen hours in all?”

86You reckon as well as M. Colbert.”

87It is now twelve oclock.”

88Half-past.”

89“Hein!—you have a handsome watch!”

90What were you saying?” said Malicorne, putting his watch quickly back into his fob.

91Ah! true; I was offering to lay you twenty pistoles against these you have lent me, that you will have the Comte de Guiche’s letter in—”

92How soon?”

93In eight hours.”

94Have you a winged horse, then?”

95That is no matter. Will you bet?”

96I shall have the comte’s letter in eight hours?”

97Yes.”

98In hand?”

99In hand.”

100Well, be it so; I lay,” said Malicorne, curious enough to know how this seller of clothes would get through.

101Is it agreed?”

102It is.”

103Pass me the pen, ink, and paper.”

104Here they are.”

105Thank you.”

106Manicamp raised himself with a sigh, and leaning on his left elbow, in his best hand, traced the following lines:—

107Good for an order for a place of maid of honor to Madame, which M. le Comte de Guiche will take upon him to obtain at sight. DE MANICAMP.”

108This painful task accomplished, he laid himself down in bed again.

109Well!” asked Malicorne, “what does this mean?”

110That means that if you are in a hurry to have the letter from the Comte de Guiche for Monsieur, I have won my wager.”

111How the devil is that?”

112That is transparent enough, I think; you take that paper.”

113Well?”

114And you set out instead of me.”

115Ah!”

116You put your horses to their best speed.”

117Good!”

118In six hours you will be at Etampes; in seven hours you have the letter from the comte, and I shall have won my wager without stirring from my bed, which suits me and you too, at the same time, I am very sure.”

119Decidedly, Manicamp, you are a great man.”

120“Hein! I know that.”

121I am to start then for Etampes?”

122Directly.”

123I am to go to the Comte de Guiche with this order?”

124He will give you a similar one for Monsieur.”

125“Monsieur will approve?”

126Instantly.”

127And I shall have my brevet?”

128You will.”

129Ah!”

130Well, I hope I behave genteely?”

131Adorably.”

132Thank you.”

133You do as you please, then, with the Comte de Guiche, Manicamp?”

134Except making money of himeverything?”

135“Diable! the exception is annoying; but then, if instead of asking him for money, you were to ask—”

136What?”

137Something important.”

138What do you call important?”

139Well! suppose one of your friends asked you to render him a service?”

140I would not render it to him.”

141Selfish fellow!”

142Or at least I would ask him what service he would render me in exchange.”

143Ah! that, perhaps, is fair. Well, that friend speaks to you.”

144What, you, Malicorne?”

145Yes; I.”

146Ah! ah! you are rich, then?”

147I have still fifty pistoles left.”

148Exactly the sum I want. Where are those fifty pistoles?”

149Here,” said Malicorne, slapping his pocket.

150Then speak, my friend; what do you want?”

151Malicorne took up the pen, ink, and paper again, and presented them all to Manicamp. Write!” said he.

152Dictate!”

153An order for a place in the household of Monsieur.”

154Oh!” said Manicamp, laying down the pen, “a place in the household of Monsieur for fifty pistoles?”

155You mistook me, my friend; you did not hear plainly.”

156What did you say, then?”

157I said five hundred.”

158And the five hundred?”

159Here they are.”

160Manicamp devoured the rouleau with his eyes; but this time Malicorne held it at a distance.

161Eh! what do you say to that? Five hundred pistoles.”

162I say it is for nothing, my friend,” said Manicamp, taking up the pen again, “and you exhaust my credit. Dictate.”

163Malicorne continued:

164Which my friend the Comte de Guiche will obtain for my friend Malicorne.”

165Thats it,” said Manicamp.

166Pardon me, you have forgotten to sign.”

167Ah! that is true. The five hundred pistoles?”

168Here are two hundred and fifty of them.”

169And the other two hundred and fifty?”

170When I am in possession of my place.”

171Manicamp made a face.

172In that case give me the recommendation back again.”

173What to do?”

174To add two words to it.”

175Two words?”

176Yes; two words only.”

177What are they?”

178In haste.”

179Malicorne returned the recommendation; Manicamp added the words.

180Good,” said Malicorne, taking back the paper.

181Manicamp began to count out the pistoles.

182There want twenty,” said he.

183How so?”

184The twenty I have won.”

185In what way?”

186By laying that you would have the letter from the Comte de Guiche in eight hours.”

187Ah! thats fair,” and he gave him the twenty pistoles.

188Manicamp began to scoop up his gold by handfuls, and pour it in cascades upon his bed.

189This second place,” murmured Malicorne, whilst drying his paper, “which, at first glance appears to cost me more than the first, but—” He stopped, took up the pen in his turn, and wrote to Montalais:—

190“MADEMOISELLE,—Announce to your friend that her commission will not be long before it arrives; I am setting out to get it signed: that will be twenty-eight leagues I shall have gone for the love of you.”

191Then with his sardonic smile, taking up the interrupted sentence:—“This place,” said he, “at first glance, appears to have cost more than the first; butthe benefit will be, I hope, in proportion with the expense, and Mademoiselle de la Valliere will bring me back more than Mademoiselle de Montalais, or else,—or else my name is not Malicorne. Farewell, Manicamp,” and he left the room.